i'm calm

Grassy homes and windows of mesh
No socks on the door but zippers were zipped
And he sat alone out there for a while
And I laid inside with the others
Belligerent still from the night before
Smelling of breath and grass
And air and sound
Oh the sound
Sitting in that trailer dimmed by vibration
And the way she looked as she watched me listen
She watched the sound move around me
While I felt it brush my hair
And kiss my lashes
While it entered my body and spoke to me everything it had
Truth
I wanted to close my eyes
But I wanted to watch her more
I laughed so much
Laughed til my ribs bruised
Laughed out a sound
I hadn't heard in years
Cheeks streaked with tears
She is always listening
I thought of her while I was there
Thought how she'd enjoy this kind
Of thing
(Though I'm sure she is sick
Of living outside)
But the drums lit up
And the moths circled above
It was too cold apparently
But I thought it was beautiful anyway
And when they landed and buzzed
I wished I wasn't so drunk
I slept soundly that night
After confessions and (truth?)
I hope
I feel lucky to know some people
Sad that others don't
I wish we could always be that free
And when we laid together that night
He strummed quietly
Strummed him to sleep
And he didn't even notice me
Blowing into the harmonica beside him