i don't know

i’m a burnt-out sleep,
a late night tweak
i’m an early riser at ten
i’m a prolific thought,
a paint-covered smock
i haven’t changed much since then.

i’m a full loaded heart,
still afraid of the dark
i’m always the last one to retire
i’m a raspy cough,
a smelly fresh cloth
i don’t know, but i know i desire.

i’m seeing things,
whatever it brings
though i don’t know what it is that i see
i’m feeling things;
like the way she sings
i don’t know, but i want to be free.

i collect fragments of this,
for a moment of bliss
its the only way i can feel whole
i take myself away,
so later i may stay
i need it to fill my soul.